Bad Bad Pillow Talk–

I have way more boobage than her... just sayin'.

After rolling around naked with The Ambassador the other day… He hit me with some terribly inappropriate pillow talk. While we were literally still connected, he looked at me and asked “Do you ever think about Captain Amazing while we’re having sex?”

Now, I know my jaw dropped… I was kind of horrified that he would ask me that in this moment. I instantly responded “No!”

In his humorous Ambassador style he immediately started trying to be funny about it, telling me he could try and imitate Captain Amazing’s voice if I wanted. I was not laughing and slid on over to my own side of the bed.

My head was still spinning. Did he really just ask me that? What the hell! I started to ask The Ambassador the same question about The Sneaky Bitch, but stopped myself short. I try -never- to ask questions I don’t want to know the answer to. I knew if that answer went sideways, I’d feel like smashing things, or crying… maybe both… AND I’d still be naked and in this intimate circumstance with him.

Of course, he didn’t want to let it go. I’m sure he pretty much knew what I was about to ask and -wanted- very much to answer it. He badgered me until I finally spilled.

“No! No, no way, of course not.” He said ” I -never- think about a different person when I’m in bed. That kind of thing just doesn’t work for me.”

I just shook my head.

“Aren’t you glad you asked the question?”

“No,” I sighed, “To be honest, I kind of wish the entire conversation had never happened.”

You see, The Ambassador knows about Captain Amazing. In fact, he’s met him. We had a dinner party with our friends, and of course Captain Amazing was there. He’s my bestie.

Well, apparently The Ambassador’s bestie is some kind of magician at reading people and picked something up by the way we interacted at the party. Later, (we were fully clothed at the time) The Ambassador asked me if Captain Amazing and I had previously had a relationship. I said “No, not really. We went out a few times. I met him on Plenty of Fish.”

Then he laid it on the line… No big surprise, I knew where it was going. “Did you ever have sex?”

I simply replied “Yes” and did not elaborate. He didn’t ask any further details, which is good because I would not have provided them. That’s the key to answering a question like that. Be truthful but don’t offer details. Nothing good can come from details in that situation.

I expected these kinds of questions would arise if I chose to stay friends with men I’ve dated. I’m fine with that. I realize I need a partner who is emotionally mature enough to not feel threatened.

The Ambassador has handled the information well, and when the topic comes up he learns a little bit more. I have let him know that Captain Amazing and I are just not a match. We have been friends through all kinds of situations. He even stayed at my place when both of us were in between relationships and still nothing happened. We know what we are, and it’s exactly where we want to be.

In turning the situation over in my mind, I realize, it wasn’t the question I found so offensive, but instead, the timing of the question… and I let him know that. When I am in bed with you, I want to be close with YOU– not talking about other people. Can we save that for another, preferably fully clothed, moment in time please? Sheeesh!

Published in: on March 4, 2012 at 9:00 am  Comments (5)  
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