Oooooh, I’m Soooo Versatile!

I was nominated for The Versatile Blogger award by the lovely and talented Teri Jensen at The Narcissist’s Blog. Thank you, Great Lady. 😉

Nominate 10-15 fellow bloggers. All blogs are super bueno… I’m only nominating 10 because all their great stuff keeps me busy just trying to read them, so I don’t end up visiting a zillion different blogs. They are my peeps. SO, the nominees are, in no particular order……..

Julie Jeske –

Life in The Farce Lane –

Ride with Blaze –

The Book Whore –

The Nature of My Game –

Misadventures in Cleveland Dating –

Life with Blondie –

Lipstick and Playdates –

Susie Lindau’s Wild Ride –

Social Kenny –

Inform the bloggers of their nomination.
Share 7 random things about yourself. Wow, this is going to be tricky. I feel like I’ve blabbed a zillion secrets on this blog already. Hmmmm… channeling randomnesssssss… Hmmmmm…

I lost my virginity when I was 17.

I made my high school sweetheart wait for A YEAR before I gave it up.

My Dad was an uninvolved non-functioning alcoholic that died at the age of 42.

I have only been published in print one time, and it was in the base newspaper in 29 Palms.

The subject of my only work in print is something called “trash diving”.

I drank only one time in highschool, and never tried any drugs.

I once had my Miranda Rights read to me in an official setting. I was -almost- in trouble.

Thank the blogger who nominated you.

Thanks a zillion, Teri, the most fabulous Narcissist I know! If you’re ever zippin’ down I-5 in to Cali, shoot me an email. I promise to offer you a warm bed and a plethora of jokes and drinks!
Add the Award pictures on your blog post.

Published in: on February 22, 2012 at 2:00 pm  Comments (2)  
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Looooong Overdue Response to Liebster Nomination

The Lieb...

Ok, so some of my lovely blogger friends have been nominating me for awards and I have been a bad bad girl and not held up my end of the bargain.

I’m sorry writer friends! It’s not that I don’t appreciate the nomination — I’m just a lazy procrastinator sometimes. Other times, I’m a spoiled writer princess… only writing things I’m super stoked about writing… which is why have not made any headway on my book with Captain Amazing, or on any of the many screenplays I have started and now collect dust waiting around begrudgingly inside my computer. baaa!

Please accept my humble apologies… sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry. I will now begin making amends…

Liebster Blog Award nomination from the Uber Fanstastico blog Life in The Farce Lane! Thank you Daaaaaling! You are a fabulous, smart, and accomplished woman, as well as a talented writer with a supportive heart. I love reading your stuff, and CHERISH your comments on mine.

The Liebster Award, for bloggers with less than 200 followers (sorry nominees, but I have no idea how many followers you have, so take your kudos and like it!). Word has it this award was meant to encourage new bloggers… and what do you know, I’m encouraged!

In accepting this award, the recipient must agree to:
• Thank the person who gave them the award and link back to their blog – Check!
• Copy and paste the award to their blog – Check!
• Reveal the 5 blogs they have chosen to award and let them know by commenting on their blog – yeah! now the fun part.
But without further ado, here is my short list of 5 blogs I think you should check out:

1. Sassy Divorced Single Mom (like me!). Her “Bad Date Chronicles” sucked me in with shocking, hilarious, and straight forward style. I also see her personality shine thru. She’s awesome. Next time I’m in the bay– we WILL meet and I will buy many many drinks. As it has been written, so it shall be done!

2. I find this blogger super raw and real… With her words, she lets it allll hang out. She can describe her pain or pleasure in such a way that I can not escape feeling what she’s feeling. Another Sassy Divorced Single Mom. Hey, I should start a club!

3. Now this babe has a whole lot goin’ on… Rants, recipes, vlog, and oh yes, the constant posts about dating and yes. Ya know that’s why I love her! BTW Foxy Momma, I am NOT that far from Portland, so… one day, not too far in the future, I shall invade your rainy city and fully expect to buy you dinner.

4. Ok, I’ve got to include a dude in the nominations today and it has to be him. His stuff is fun and insightful, even a little sentimental, but my favorite thing about his blog is that reading it is just like talking to him. It’s down to earth and hella cool. Enter at your own risk, ladies. 😉 This guy could charm the habit off a nun!

5. This last blogger is a little different from the rest of us. She’s not a single person writing about her experiences, but instead she’s married and writing about improving relationships and she’s got a Masters in Psych (concentration: marriage and family therapy) to back her up. Her blog is always getting better. She writes clean, clearly, and consistantly and almost always includes info helpful for singles.

Congrats blogger besties! Cheers to you. Salute!

Published in: on February 21, 2012 at 4:33 pm  Comments (4)  
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A Hard Beta is Good To Find

I’ve been tooling around in the manosphere lately, and gaining all kinds of understanding about all kinds of man type things. I’ve been reading bloggers that I love like Jordan, Blaze Frazier, and a little Bronan the Barbian (althought he tends to be a little barbaric for my taste)

From there I have ventured out to other sites in the “manosphere” that said original guy bloggers mentioned.. like Single White Male, The Private Man, Danny from 504, and Keoni Galt

Obviously I can’t say I agree with all the opinions expressed -in fact, I’m certain some raised my blood pressure and cause steam to shoot out my ears- but I will admit— they are all very fine writers.
Apparently, there is an entire Men’s Right’s Revolution out there that I was completely unaware of. They even have thier own acronyms which I am not ashamed to say I had to google to understand.. Some acronyms I’ve noticed include;

PUA- pick up artist
LTR- long term relationship (ok, I figured that one out on my own)
MGTOW- Men going thier own way
MRA- Men’s rights activist

A great website to start understanding these terms and oh so much more –can be found here

My adventures in to man land have been enlightening, infuriating, disappointing, encouraging… such a tangle of emotions. My absolute FAVORITE topic was the question of Alpha males. What it means and what do women want.
I messaged back and forth with Jordon from “The Nature of My Game” about this Alpha/ Beta thing. He had mentioned in one of his blogs that he is in transition from Beta to Alpha. “WHY would you want to do that, hun?” I asked “I’ll take a beta over an alpha any day.”

He made a good point after that… He said “Do you? From the sounds of your posts its the opposite, at least for your dating. I can see you picking a beta for marriage.”

I replied “YES… You are correct that I somehow end up meeting a lot of Alphas– but more often than not, I have found that Alpha=A-hole. (Who knows, maybe those guys weren’t doing it right. )…..”

Well, he’s got me there. I am immersed in a world of Alphas. I do work in Law Enforcement after all. I have to say, however, that Jordon is right to some degree.

I think Alphas tend to do well in the initial stages of dating because they are less concerned about everyone’s feelings. They’ll just move forward and go after what they want in t he moment. In my mind, Betas have a whole lot more on thier minds — They let themselves feel the emotion of it.

I’m fairly certain my idea of alphas and betas would be quite different from that of the writer’s in the manosphere. I wish one of these guys would write a post and define the terms as they see it. In fact, I think they should ALL write one.

I think about it in terms of relationship dynamics. Alpha being confident, and dominant but in my book that also comes with abrasive and disrespectful. Beta being less confident and assertive but more keyed in to the emotions of the situation and his woman.

In the manosphere is it simply dominant vs. submissive? So, what do we call it when we land somewhere in the middle? I want a partner, not a fucking owner. That’s where I got my title. A hard Beta is good to find.
In my mind a hard Beta being a man who is a partner yet still the dominant one in the mix. (He is the man after all). This dominance is not taken brutally like the spoils of war, but instead something that is agreed upon by both partners.

God wired men and women differently. He created us to be somewhat yin and yang. I recognize that. I want a partner to walk beside me (not in front of me, expecting me to trail behind bowing my head) but just like in ballroom dance… The man should lead, and the woman should let him. That doesn’t mean he yanks her around the floor like a rag doll. It also doesn’t mean she has no input as to where they travel.

I do want a man who is strong and decisive. Who knows what he wants and leads. I don’t want someone who will step all over me. I’m soft-hearted and I don’t need that bullshit. I’ve had enough of that.

I have decided a hard beta is good to find. That’s how I’d define The Firefighter I loved like crazy. He is a beta, but strong enough to stand up, look me in the eye and say what he felt.

I guess it’s all in the way you define Alpha and Beta, and some dudes in the manosphere go overboard with the dominance thing. There are some, though, that shine like a light in the dark. Danny from 504, while still being Alpha, seems to have a genuine appreciation for the fairer sex.

I also greatly appreciate Keoni’s take on relationship dynamics.

For me, for now… I’m just going to say — A Hard Beta is Good To Find.

Published in: on January 7, 2012 at 9:00 am  Comments (7)  
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