Hollywood Reset

I was just watching “Wanted”. You know that kick ass assassin movie with Angelina Jolie? I thought about Jordon’s Beta to Alpha reset, and decided this could be Hollywood’s version of that type of reset.

I’m not a huge Angelina fan, but when she’s all funked out (like in this one & gone in 60 Seconds)– I can watch.

To start the movie, the male lead walks around through life showing the viewers just how horrific he’s got it… and I mean right down to the ATM telling him “Your best friend is screwing your girlfriend and you’re too much of a wuss to do anything about it.”

He’s prone to frequent panic attacks, apologizes incessantly— but I was really struck by his reaction to Angelina’s charachter.

At one point Angelina appears standing in front of him all sultry like, speaking slowly, looking him straight in the eye. He just looks uncomfortable and says “I’m sorry?”

That woman is power… She exudes sexuality and yet, he doesn’t see it. He doesn’t feel it that way. He’s just shaking in his boots, looking at the whole world through the eyes of fear. Where have I seen THAT before? And how do I find these knuckleheads? Jeez.

Next she starts dragging him around like a rag doll, saving his ass.

Anyway, I won’t ruin the rest of the flick. It’s a fantastic movie. If you haven’t already seen it, definately check it out.

Published in: on January 22, 2012 at 9:00 am  Comments (2)  
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A Hard Beta is Good To Find

I’ve been tooling around in the manosphere lately, and gaining all kinds of understanding about all kinds of man type things. I’ve been reading bloggers that I love like Jordan thenatureofmygame.net, Blaze Frazier ridewithblaze.wordpress.com, and a little Bronan the Barbian (althought he tends to be a little barbaric for my taste) bronanthebarbarian.com.

From there I have ventured out to other sites in the “manosphere” that said original guy bloggers mentioned.. like Single White Male singlewm.com, The Private Man theprivateman.wordpress.com, Danny from 504 dannyfrom504.wordpress.com, and Keoni Galt hawaiianlibertarian.blogspot.com.

Obviously I can’t say I agree with all the opinions expressed -in fact, I’m certain some raised my blood pressure and cause steam to shoot out my ears- but I will admit— they are all very fine writers.
Apparently, there is an entire Men’s Right’s Revolution out there that I was completely unaware of. They even have thier own acronyms which I am not ashamed to say I had to google to understand.. Some acronyms I’ve noticed include;

PUA- pick up artist
LTR- long term relationship (ok, I figured that one out on my own)
MGTOW- Men going thier own way
MRA- Men’s rights activist

A great website to start understanding these terms and oh so much more –can be found here

My adventures in to man land have been enlightening, infuriating, disappointing, encouraging… such a tangle of emotions. My absolute FAVORITE topic was the question of Alpha males. What it means and what do women want.
I messaged back and forth with Jordon from “The Nature of My Game” about this Alpha/ Beta thing. He had mentioned in one of his blogs that he is in transition from Beta to Alpha. “WHY would you want to do that, hun?” I asked “I’ll take a beta over an alpha any day.”

He made a good point after that… He said “Do you? From the sounds of your posts its the opposite, at least for your dating. I can see you picking a beta for marriage.”

I replied “YES… You are correct that I somehow end up meeting a lot of Alphas– but more often than not, I have found that Alpha=A-hole. (Who knows, maybe those guys weren’t doing it right. )…..”

Well, he’s got me there. I am immersed in a world of Alphas. I do work in Law Enforcement after all. I have to say, however, that Jordon is right to some degree.

I think Alphas tend to do well in the initial stages of dating because they are less concerned about everyone’s feelings. They’ll just move forward and go after what they want in t he moment. In my mind, Betas have a whole lot more on thier minds — They let themselves feel the emotion of it.

I’m fairly certain my idea of alphas and betas would be quite different from that of the writer’s in the manosphere. I wish one of these guys would write a post and define the terms as they see it. In fact, I think they should ALL write one.

I think about it in terms of relationship dynamics. Alpha being confident, and dominant but in my book that also comes with abrasive and disrespectful. Beta being less confident and assertive but more keyed in to the emotions of the situation and his woman.

In the manosphere is it simply dominant vs. submissive? So, what do we call it when we land somewhere in the middle? I want a partner, not a fucking owner. That’s where I got my title. A hard Beta is good to find.
In my mind a hard Beta being a man who is a partner yet still the dominant one in the mix. (He is the man after all). This dominance is not taken brutally like the spoils of war, but instead something that is agreed upon by both partners.

God wired men and women differently. He created us to be somewhat yin and yang. I recognize that. I want a partner to walk beside me (not in front of me, expecting me to trail behind bowing my head) but just like in ballroom dance… The man should lead, and the woman should let him. That doesn’t mean he yanks her around the floor like a rag doll. It also doesn’t mean she has no input as to where they travel.

I do want a man who is strong and decisive. Who knows what he wants and leads. I don’t want someone who will step all over me. I’m soft-hearted and I don’t need that bullshit. I’ve had enough of that.

I have decided a hard beta is good to find. That’s how I’d define The Firefighter I loved like crazy. He is a beta, but strong enough to stand up, look me in the eye and say what he felt.

I guess it’s all in the way you define Alpha and Beta, and some dudes in the manosphere go overboard with the dominance thing. There are some, though, that shine like a light in the dark. Danny from 504, while still being Alpha, seems to have a genuine appreciation for the fairer sex. http://dannyfrom504.wordpress.com/

I also greatly appreciate Keoni’s take on relationship dynamics. http://hawaiianlibertarian.blogspot.com/2009/09/relationship-dynamics.html

For me, for now… I’m just going to say — A Hard Beta is Good To Find.

Published in: on January 7, 2012 at 9:00 am  Comments (7)  
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