The Men in My Atmosphere

I was thinking Social Kenny’s previous comment on one of my posts about a harem…  Like maybe I needed a new harem.  I immediately thought… no thanks!

Today I realize, it’s not so much a matter of what is or isn’t there in my life, but instead — where my focus lies.  I haven’t been writing about the men in my atmosphere because that’s not where my focus is at the moment, but there are men in my atmosphere.  Even in small towns I guess Danny’s words ring true — there will always be another man.

Lately, I find myself truckin’ along through life paying little attention to the men in my vicinity.  In large part it’s because my intuition and moral compass are telling my the situations just aren’t right.

These days I often hear from Mr. Cool, and The Duke… They are both incredible extraordinary men just oozing with charisma.   Friends yes, but from time to time they seem to want to step over the line.  That’s a no-go..  They are married.

I just don’t understand women who do that sort of thing.  It seems to me to be a bad idea on so many fronts.  First, in this life one of the things I most pride myself on is not hurting others.  I think taking part in the possible nuclear explosion of someone’s marriage would be going against that value.

Next, it seems a bad decision for a women’s self-esteem too.  Why would you consent to not only sharing him but also NOT being #1 on the list.  You might think you’re the one he really loves, but the fact is– he is married to someone else.   They have a life together, a history, and a home.  If nothing else, he is legally bound to his wife– not you.  Not what I’m looking for.

I still hear from Mr. Off Limits fairly often.  I even bumped in to him in the grocery store the other day.  You’d think that would happen more than once ever 4 years, but not so…

Mr. Off Limits is a totally sexy guy but seemingly closed off.  He does his absolute best to steer our conversations (text message) right to sexy time at every change he gets.  Recently, after having remarked about this time and time again, it results in my not replying any further.  No thanks.

“…raise your hand if the shape of your hips don’t compare to the shape of your mind”  –from One Girl Revolution by Saving Jane

Mr. Off Limits is also a solid, honorable, committed hard-working guy… but again my intuition is just screaming that we are not a match.  I think he does want a relationship but is maybe someone who does want a relationship but maybe doesn’t want to actually put any effort in to it.  He’s suggested a date a few times, but never followed up to confirm any sort of plan.  We’ve been flirting by text message for how long now?  More than two years!

The Collector even popped up on my phone the other day.  A couple of text messages, a missed call, a voicemail.   He rambled on to my message machine talking about how he’d been in my town to ride the mountain biking trails, and was hanging out with his girlfriend.

All I could think about was how I couldn’t drag his ass to my town when we were seeing each other.  I even bought a home during that time and really wanted to show it off.  Still nope.  He comes down here now, though?  And why is he trying to charm the socks off my voicemail when the day before he was “hanging out with the girlfriend”?

I sent a warm and polite text in reply but I did not return his call.  There were several times he operated in a fashion I did not appreciate.  No thanks.

So, even in a time when I’m feeling reclusive and I have NO profiles posted on any dating sites…  There are men in my atmosphere, just nothing that feels right.  Not just those that I have dated before or known for years, but new ones too…  The Road Dog, The Drug Cop and The Softball Coach.  I just haven’t been paying much attention to their attentions.  My focus is else where…  if it’s meant to be, it shall be.

I’ve got some “me projects” I’m working on, and I have no intention of putting up with any bullshit–  like The Collector hitting on some wine girl while we are there together.    When the right time comes, and the right guy comes along, it’ll happen just like it’s supposed to.

Published in: on July 29, 2012 at 9:00 am  Comments (2)  
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2 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. a warm and peaceful writing. Walter

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