Serious as a Teenage Love Affair

just a couple a kids

We hung out the next day after the massage. All was good and I realized the word “we” had aggressively invaded his vocabulary. I have NO problem with that at all but I was aware that I remain UNkissed even with this new developement.

He also gave me his cell phone number with NO prompting from me at all. Only one other person on the planet has that number, plus he doesn’t take it everywhere he goes so it’s rather hit and miss. Still, that was important.

We walked down town and checked out some of the stores. We were waiting for one particular shop to open so we could take a look at a severely overpriced kitchen table he liked. Walking side by side and laughing together… There was a moment when I reached out and wrapped an arm around him and he reciprocated.

I asked if he wanted to get some food at The Gourmet Pizza Shack on the street, and he replied “I’ve only got $14”. I told him it was no problem– I’d get the check today.

As we sat eating and talking… He said “Now, how do you want things to be when we go out to eat?” With his BFF, The Goofy Musician, whoever suggests the meal buys… and that’s not how things had gone on my birthday which wasn’t a problem but surprised him.

I just told him I wanted it to not be a big deal. I want him to be comfortable enough with me to say “I’ve only got $14”. Sometimes I’ll get it, sometimes he will. I just don’t want to keep a ledger.

This seemed to work fine for him… I’m sure he was waiting to hear that I expected him to pay every time but I’m just not that kind of girl.

After lunch we walked down to see the table we had come out to view in the first place. Right as we were getting ready to leave The Gourmet Pizza shack my anxiety started to rise. (Over the past year or so I’ve been on a vitamin regimen that calms my anxiety, so it hasn’t been a problem but I manage to derail myself from that routine lately. ugh!)

I told him about the anxiety and he offered to drive us around town if I wanted. Later I found out driving calms his anxiety. “No,” I replied “when I feel this way I just want to get home and sit a little bit.” I told him we could still pop in to see the table.. after that we quickly went back to my house.

We stoked the fire (literally) and chatted on my couch… At one point he said being with The Sneaky Bitch (Of course, HE didn’t call her that. That’s MY secret nickname for her.)was a mistake. He was trying to make it into “go slow, get to know” but we had that the whole time.

I know I beamed when I heard that. I reached over and hugged him tight. He also said every relationship he’s ever had started out with the girl just taking him by the hand and marching him right in to the bedroom.

This results in jumping in to a relationship in the “instant relationship”… then before you know the other person says the “L” word and you don’t want to hurt her feelings so you go along, or whatever. He’s never been with someone who waited for him to “get there”.

I said I don’t do that, because then how do you know what you’re getting is genuine? How do you know the guy’s in there because he wants to be with you and not because there was suddenly a naked girl in front of him? Plus, I think men are wired to chase (even the Betas) and women should let them.

I got the impression from this conversation that we are going for feelings FIRST, sex later… even though that’s not the way most people operate these days. I’m good with that.

As he was leaving he said he wanted to have a party so he could meet my friends. He offered to help me get the house ready for the party and to co-host it with me. I sassed “I don’t know… I only let boyfriend’s do that sort of thing.”

We had a good laugh over it… but the truth is… That’s a couple thing. Once again things seemed sort of out-of-order for me. I decided to roll with it though, and made him promise to invite his friends too. We settled on potluck style and The Ambassador offered to bring his grill over and make gourmet burgers. He’s an amazing Chef.

Later I was talking to Captain Amazing, who is unimpressed since I am still UNkissed. I finally said to him… “Ya know, I feel like a teenager.”

When I was a teenager it was just like this. Every step took a reeeeally long time, and the first kiss NEVER got parlayed into sex. This all gave feelings a chance to develope. You became a couple before any sex happened. By the time sexy time happened, you were in love.

“But you’re NOT a teenager! And sex…” replied Captain Amazing begining his objection.

I stopped him and said “Yes but The Ambassador has never had that. He didn’t grow up like you did. While you and I were having those kinds of relationships, he was lost in a drunken haze. (The Ambassador is a recovered alcoholic. Sober 5 yrs now.) AND ya know, I’m ok with that.”

Captain Amazing relented saying “as long as you’re ok with it.”

I am ok with it… for now… as long as we keep moving in a positive direction.

Published in: on January 3, 2012 at 9:00 am  Comments (4)  
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4 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. There is no rulebook for this sort of thing. You wouldn’t want one, anyway. I tend to kiss pretty quickly, but if I were really into someone (and single), I doubt I’d move fast. So you’re taking it at the right pace for both of you.

    I’m waiting with bated breath, right alongside of you.

    • Yes.. all we have is the status quo. Ya know, he’s just too fantastic to give up on. The sloooow thing isn’t all that fun for me but I can hang for a while.

  2. totally and utterly agree re the teen speed dating thing, because you’d spy each other thru occasional events but only probably be able to hang out on weekends or Friday evenings, it went slow by default and it was fun and we delighted in that feeling growing inside us.

    I well recall it..

    Of course, teens nowadays aint going slow, thanks to phones, texts and the interweb chat etc but it was a nice time back in the olden days, before all that ..

    Savour those feelings, as you say – so long as we’re heading in the right direction, yippee! (yes, I said we. Deal with it..)

    • Trying trying trying to savour and not be obsessed with what is to come (so to speak… hehehe).

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