The Hot Blooded Latino

So, I’m out in my yard loading up this giant brush pile with a friend of mine when this super hott guy in a classic yellow 1971 Dodge pick up pulls up… The driver leans out the window and asks “want some help?”

It was confusing at first. I thought my friend knew him, and he probably thought I knew him. Once I figured out that he had just been driving by and offered to help… I accepted. I introduced myself and we got the yard taken care of.

He explained that he moved out of the rental he had with some room mates and was lookin’ for another apartment. He had moved his meager possessions into a motel for the time being. I took his number and told him I’d send him information on any rentals I saw.

When I told my Bestie about him, he was like “Did you get his number? Why don’t you call him??”

I said “nope, he’s got my number. If he’s interested, he’ll call.” I was feeling all super confident. I’ve got everything going for me, so made no difference to me one way or the other.

Sure enough, the next day he calls. We chat in a sort of awkward way… and finally I say “hey, I’m gonna pick up a frozen pizza. Want to come by later and have some pizza and a glass of wine?”

He sounded super excited… and why shouldn’t he?  I’m awesome.  lol.

So, he comes over and we chat and drink a little. He drank quite a bit more than I did. I didn’t even get a buzz.

He’s a short stocky guy. 5’4″ with dark hair, shaved and full luscious lips. I love his build, and I’m a tiny gal who generally dates very tall men, so in this case it was fantastic to be able to look him in the face. A very handsome face at that!

He refused to tell me how old he is, but I surmised it was over 21, but under 25. He didn’t want to turn me off by telling me his age, but it didn’t matter to me as long as I could be assured that he was legal.

We played some cards, kinda half way watched a movie… and then he sits a little closer on the couch. He asks to rub my feet….

Now, here’s what’s going through my head. How far do I want to let this go?? I read “Why Men Love Bitches” and I believe… So I had no intention of sleeping with him. First mistake, inviting him to my house on the first date. Public place! Public Place, Ladies, remember that! I’ve gotta remember that next time.

I let him rub my feet, which he did vigorously. Then he kissed me. Wow, what a great kisser. So sexy, he’s a slow-moving, hands caressing look you in the eye kind of kisser. I have been told that if someone can turn you on just by kissing you, you’ll never have any trouble in bed. “Whew,” I thought, “if that’s true this is gonna be incredible!”

He, of course, was trying to accelerate the situation, and I eventually told him it was time to go. He tried EVERYTHING to get me into bed. I mean EVERYTHING. 

He tried…

 –not complying when I said no.. So I had to say it all serious like.

–asking me to come sit next to him on the couch and just watch the movie. Which I do, but sure enough he heads in for the heavy-duty make out. We play this little push-pull game for a while. Me trying to get him out the door, him stalling with everything he had.

— “It’s just been such a long time. It’s been like a year and a half and I finally meet a beautiful woman…”

–begging me to let him sleep on the couch. “I swear I’ll stay on the couch. You can even lock your door.” Yeah right!!!

— “I’ve had too much to drink, I can’t drive” 

–“I don’t feel like driving”

–“you’re going to make me walk home when they could get me for drunk in public?” That last one was really a stretch. I could obviously tell he was not that drunk.

None worked.  Sorry Senior, no can do! He even tried the age-old “You are a hard-working single Mom and you deserve everything. You deserve to be pampered. Don’t ever forget that.” blah blah blah.  Whatever.

“I don’t do this” I said, “Go to bed with someone I just met” (ok so I fibbed a little bit). He tries complaining that he’s going to have to go home and masturbate. “well, I guess that’s the predicament you’re in” I reply. 

It took a LONG time but I slowly got him out the door, around the corner and to his truck. I mean, this guy wanted me like crazy and made no bones about telling me that.

He kept hanging on to me, taking me in his arms, and playfully grabbing me, kissing me. He’s the perfect height. I’m just a petite little things, and I could look in to his eyes with his arms around my waist. I really enjoyed the game, until he finally left and I was thoroughly UNsatisfied.. plus, all turned on and charged full of adrenaline. I couldn’t sleep for hours.

I was SO proud of myself for kicking him out. Incredibly proud. I felt really good about it. I felt fantastic that I didn’t go along with things just because that’s what he wanted. He called twice later throughout the night but I did not pick up.

Before he left, he made me promise to have breakfast with him.

I got up the next day and did my work out and then called him at 9am as planned. We went to a quaint little home style restaurant for breakfast, and it was nice and a little bit awkward. I was far more nervous that morning than I had been the night before. (which i told him). I don’t know why.

We chatted about his family and mine. It was slightly awkward conversation, probably because we had jumped ahead a bit on the physical front. He mentioned that he had nothing to do that day and was bored. That was apparently his usual state when he was not working. I suggested we go out to river later in the day, and thought that might be fun.

I kept asking him how he got to this tiny town with no family or friends here. He insisted he had come up here from the big city to go camping once and liked it. He also said it was getting harder to find work in the city.

I am someone who believes that when we make big changes in life, we are either moving toward something or away from something… and what he was saying just wasn’t adding up for me. I kept my eyes wide open about this.

He kissed me long and slow and tried to talk me in to coming back to his place, which I did not. He gave up a little easier this time but I could tell he was going to make this holding out thing VERY difficult for me.

I went home for several hours under the guise of needing to write. I took a nap instead. I had some time to think though. I thought about him for a while and how much anxiety I was feeling caused by the overwhelming sexual tension. I also tooled around Mike the Master Dater’s site looking up things like “What’s the right time to sleep with a guy.” I decided I liked what he had to say.. It was basically “Why deprive yourself? Sex is great! Just don’t have any expectations afterward”.

I reasoned it out and decided I could live with that. If it didn’t workout, I really wouldn’t care. I have everything going for me, and at least then I wouldn’t have to have that awkward conversation with The Ramblin’ Man. I also glanced at Evan Marc Katz blog post “When Should a Girl Have Sex With a Guy” and he said sometimes all the rules go out the window. Ahhh, more validation.

Plus, I decided I don’t like holding out only to manipulate anyone into a relationship. I reasoned that if he genuinely like me then he would want to see me again, and if not at least I’ll get some incredible hott nasty sex out of the deal.

I thought back to my last two relationships. When we clicked there was no bullshit. There was no “oh, does he like me? Did I sleep with him too soon?” or any of that. It just was. And anyway, I REALLY wanted him. I can’t remember being the last time I was that revved up. Ok, maybe with Captain Amazing.

He called a half an hour before our set time to tell me he was ready. I said ok, but waited until our allotted time, then I went by and picked him up.

We stopped to get gas on our way out to the river, and he climbed out of the car. He wasn’t on his way into the store though, he was waiting to pump the gas for me. That was a nice little slice of chivalry.

We headed out to the river, and it was absolutely gorgeous. The picnic area we stopped at was a shallow place with soft sand beneath the surface and under your toes. We walked around in it for some time. He was huffin’ and puffin’ over how cold it was but eventually got completely into the water, and of course, wouldn’t let me get away with staying half way dry. We splashed around some, and he grabbed me and pulled me into his arms and deeper into the water.

We decided to take a walk, wading through the water, a little further down stream. He held my waist helping me balance as we wobbled our way down the river. We eventually found this gorgeous comfy rock with a divet carved out of it, a perfect chair made for two. We climbed on to the rock and sat close.

When he put his arm around me, I leaned my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes feeling the warmth of the rock and his arms. Over and over again he asked me what I was thinking and I responded that not much was on my mind besides the relaxation of the day. I drank in the physical touch and feel of his skin. I soaked up the sun and the breath-taking view.

We finally peeled ourselves off the rock and headed back toward where we had gotten in the river. At one point, he took me in his arms again and kissed me for a time… when I opened my eyes there was a water snake slitherin’ right past us. I clung to him in terror.

We packed up our things and headed back to the car, and he said “We should dance. We should go back and dance and be all romantic.”

The whole adventure was quite the high. I was crazy about all the PDA (public displays of affection) and finally agreed.

When we got back to his place, we started to fool around right away. I guess he was certain I was there for the duration, because any thoughts of dancing and romance went right out the window. We walked in to his room where he picked me up and tossed me on to the bed. I was excited and ready to go but it wasn’t long before I realized this wasn’t going to be the triumph I’d hoped for.

It pretty much consisted of him getting off and not being able to keep it up long enough for me to get mine… and I’m quick! I was SO surprised, because the last guy I was with that was so much younger had stamina like there was no tomorrow. He was also well equipped, and unfortunately The Hot Blooded Latino is not. (Ding ding, two more points for Mike the Master Dater.. In his post “Big Noses, Long Hoses” he says “moobs” are a sign of a –well, possibly less than adequate package, guess what.. bingo! He nailed it.)

We showered together and I finally learned the key to his arrival in my small town… I asked about the gorgeous ring he wears on his right hand and he confessed he had been engaged, and it broke up right around the time he moved, 4 months ago. Still, he insisted that had nothing to do with his moving here. “I’m strong” he said “I don’t run away.” In fact he said it several times, but it was just defensive gibberish. Like I said, I believe people are either moving toward something or away from something.

I was also unimpressed by this revelation for several reasons. I realized that

A. he had lied to me in trying to used “it’s been such a long time. It’s been like a year and a half!” excuse when trying to convince me that first night

B. He was obviously not being honest with himself about the situation. I made me crinkly up my forehead wondering how emotionally immature he actually was, and

C. He wasn’t open about what had happened to end his engagement.

After the shower, he asked if he could come by my place and do some laundry. Since he’s in transition, I agreed. Right about this time I was starting to feel kind of claustrophobic. I thought “man, this guy is just hangin’ around and hangin’ around and hangin’ around. He’s already loungin’ on my couch with his feet up, eating up my food and seemingly expecting me to cook for him… which I did NOT do.

Funny enough… something changed for him too it seemed. It was like once we fooled around the attraction dropped off significantly. It was SO immediate, like switching off a light.

We fooled around again after he took my head and led me to the bed. Hey, I’m not above givin’ a guy a second chance. He utilized his pick me up, toss me on the bed move. Unfortunately, the second time was even more unsatisfying than the first. Afterward we rinsed off and he laid on the bed for a snooze. I stood over him rubbing his chest and we talked a little bit about age differences and past relationships. I told him I dated a guy who was also 11 years younger than me… like he is. At that moment, seemingly out of the blue he popped off with “but we’re not dating”.

Immediately my spine stiffened, my teeth clenched, and it’s a good damn thing it was dark in there because I’m sure my face was cherry red. I managed to keep it together and say “well, whatever. And you can nap for a little bit, but I have to pick my kids up very early in the morning so I’ll need to drive you home soon”. I left him to snooze and went and puttered around my house as LOUDLY as possible.

The audacity! How incredibly disrespectful. He should BE so lucky! ha! I left him for a few, while I packed up his laundry.

Now I HATE all these different levels of dating, as I have said before. just when I think I’ve got them figured out, the frickin’ definitions seem to change.

Look, in my mind, if you are handin’ out PDA like it’s going out of style, and going on dates… then aren’t you “dating”? Sounds simple enough, doesn’t it? But, OH NO, these days people want to call every little thing something different.

It wasn’t that I wanted anything out of this guy, other than a good time (which I didn’t even get). I had seen enough red flags out of him already, but the way he said it pissed me off.

I went back in to my room to get his ass out of bed… I did it politely. He rolled on to his side and said “come lay down with me”. “No” I replied. “No? What did I do wrong?” he asked. “Nothing but I’ll fall asleep and I have to pick my kids up really early,” I said… And you can NOT be here, I thought to myself.

As he moved to get out of the car he said “so, we’ll see each other. I’m not going to call cuz you have your kids.” I scoffed and said “that doesn’t mean you can’t call me”. It’s not like I’m falling off the face of the planet. He replied with something like “ya, but just have your time with your kids” or whatever. I smiled my fakey fake smile and said “bye”. I was SO glad to get back to my house, ALONE, and lay down to rest.

I do not appreciate people who are not honest about their intentions, or toy with people for their own ulterior motives. That’s what I felt like happened here. Who know, maybe he thought he’d have a comfy place to kick around until he found another rental… or maybe he just wanted to get laid. Either way, he’s back in his tiny motel room by himself watchin’ bad tv… and I am getting on with my fantastic life.

I wonder if anyone ever told The Hot Blooded Latino about karma…

Published in: on August 23, 2011 at 9:00 am  Comments (3)  
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3 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. wooww.. i can just feel your disappointment.. :-/ ..

    • Thank you.. I did a realistic job describing the experience then. That seems to be how it always goes.. Try not too get excited, but of course, I can’t help it… And in the end, for whatever reason, disappointment. I just try to have fun alon the way!

      • I know, i was so excited when i was reading through until the part were you actually do the dirty nasty deed.. then soo disappointed to hear he wasn’t as you thought.. 😀

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