Upcoming Camping Trip; with The Red Hott Ramblin Man

I am planning a camping trip with The Red Hott Ramblin’ Man. He invited me to do this loop road trip with him. We will meander over towards a breathtaking campground, stopping at wineries along the way. We’ll stay overnight in his tent and he’ll make a fantastic dinner over the campfire… We’ll tour the area and small towns and check out shops. Camp a second night at another terrific site and make our way back to the Higginbotham.

Oh, he also plans to stop along the way to take a swim. I checked the weather report though, and it’s supposed to be 60 degrees. lol. He’s frickin’ crazy if he thinks I’m going to swim when it’s 60 degrees!

 I am finding myself pretty nervous about this trip. I’ve only seen the Red Hott Ramblin’ Man twice before, even though we’ve been talking for several months. I just keep telling myself “just be yourself”!

I think part of my nervousness is because I don’t know what exactly to expect… or what he wants. Or maybe it’s because I do know what he wants. He was very clear with me from the beginning… before we met in person.. that he won’t be ready for any kind of committment for at least six months and he intends to just be a playmate. He explained that his Plenty of Fish profile states he was looking for “long-term” but was there for “dating, nothing serious”. Ha! Even after his explanation, what the hell does that mean? I just want to date forever and never have anything serious?  ahhh, who knows.  I enjoy his company and I know I’m safe with him.

It’s so weird… If I was in that situation… just coming out of a relationship and not wanting to get in to another relationship right away, I wouldn’t have been on POF looking for someone. If I wasn’t ready to be all in. Why do men do this??

He also recently sent me a message that said “this is the theme song for your next boyfriend.” It was SO weird. definitely like that would NOT be him. Yet, he makes a special effort to let me know he’s not checking out other women.

The Red Hott Ramblin’ Man has hid his dating profile.  Probably  out of sheer frustration… or is it because of me? I’m not sure. I hid my profile too but it’s because I feel like I’ve completely got my hands full at the moment. I don’t want anyone else in the mix. He probably doesn’t know why I did it either.

I am finding myself in self-preservation mode with this guy. I feel like I am just dipping a toe in testing the water. Afraid to have any fun with it or jump in with a splash… I don’t want to get hurt and I’m an attacher.. I attach to people.

Plus, he’s so busy that we don’t communicate as frequently as I’d like. I think that’s partly being busy and partly enjoying his time with his buddies and being on his own after the recent relationship he’s come out of.  Just guessing here, we haven’t really talked about it.

I want an everyday thing. I want a relationship. Why is that so frickin’ difficult? Why is it that every good man I meet is in some weird situation (usually just getting out of a relationship) which also seems to put me in limbo?

I have to give the Red Hott Ramblin’ Man a break though. We really are still getting to know each other. I am really trying to sit back and enjoy things, without attempting to steer the situation in any particular direction but’s it’s really really hard for me.  ughhh.

Published in: on July 11, 2011 at 9:43 am  Leave a Comment  
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