Spontaneous Star-Gazing

Mr. Hard Body has been around quite a bit. He has driven me out to the dump in his pick up truck more than once. He’s helped me move stuff. He’s helped me pick up my new sofa in his pick up, ( He’s my truck man. 😉 and he’s come around just to sit and drink coffee and talk.

 

Mr. Hard Body even popped in while my parents, grandparents, and two aunts were in from out-of-state. This was a terrific day. He had stopped in once earlier in the day, and then dropped by later around 11pm. As he looked around the house he noticed that my two children were nowhere to be seen, so he said “Are the kids asleep? Will they watch them? Want to go somewhere with me?”

 

I was really surprised. I don’t consider myself a really spontaneous person but I was game. I made sure my parents would listen for the kids, and Mr. Hard Body loaded up a couple of camping chairs from my yard and we took off in his truck. We drove just outside of town and down a dirt road… We rumbled along away from the lights of the town and down a road lined with farm land. We stopped in a turn out and he shut off the truck. He said he remembered watching the stars as a kid, so at some point in the last few years he found this little spot and dubbed it his own.

 

We climbed into the back of his pick up and unfolded the camp chairs. There was cardboard in the back of the truck because not only had I recently gotten a new place, but so had he. He moved the cardboard around to block the wind, and we sat and talked.

 

He talked about how most people would probably do this with a beer, but he doesn’t drink anymore. He’s a recovered alcoholic, who just passed 4 years sober. He talked about his last relationship and how that girl HATED his spontaneous star-gazing and never wanted to go.

 

I just don’t understand that. It was a beautiful clear night and you could see SO many stars. Not to mention the fact that she was out there with someone she was supposedly in love with. That sounds like heaven to me, but once again I hear about the women who just can’t appreciate what is right in front of them.

 

I wonder if I might have looked that way to outsiders when leaving my last relationship… so maybe it isn’t so much that they don’t appreciate it.. with me it was that the bad things (arguments and such, which happened in private) overwhelmed the good. I continue to wonder and relax…. trying to stay warm and just enjoy the moment.

 

I then began to wonder if Mr. Hard Body would break the touch barrier. How stinkin slow does he want to go? It’s been weeks. I have seen him many times and he’s never laid a hand on me. Wierd. BUT once again, I remind myself that I am not trying to MAKE anything happen. So, I wait…

 

He talks about work and nutrition and riding his mountain bike. He’s smart and ambitious… adventurous and fun. I think how in many ways he’s like the Ramblin’ Man. Both of them have this life centered around career. No children, never married (as a rolling stone gathers no moss). There must be something in my life God wants these men to see.

 

I also think about how my last boyfriend was in the same situation… never married, no kids. By the end though, despite the fact that we argued constantly, I think he really really wanted to be a part of my little family. I’m lucky that way. I have a wonderful sweet little family and I am all heart. I do everything I can to treat them with respect and love and teach them all that I can.

 

Before long it was just too cold to keep sitting out there, so we loaded up and went home. It was a wonderful experience but he kept his distance and didn’t make a move.

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Published in: on June 30, 2011 at 3:19 am  Leave a Comment  
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