First Date with Meat Head, the Ice Cream Man

Meat Head…  This is the first name he introduced himself by.  Not his real name, obviously, but also not a flattering nickname either.  I have to admit he was also evasive when I asked him how he got that nickname too, so I am very curious.  That nickname is a hard one to get over.

So, I found Meat Head on Plenty of Fish, which is by far my favorite dating site.  I clicked on a picture of a burly guy with his big arms around three kids at the beach.  Very cool, I thought, but hard to see him.  He was crouched down and had sunglasses on, and there were no other photos of him. 

I have had a bad experience with this before.  I was texting with a guy once who sent me a photo of himself while he was laying back on the couch.  WARNING:  if you are not a super thin person this may NOT be a flattering position to take a photo in– and also ALWAYS preview pics before sending. 

Good God, that pic was horrifying.  Every person I showed it to looked like they were about to cry.  He was SO heavy.  I hate to say it because I’m really not a mean person at heart, but Lord he looked like a fat lazy slob.  It was horrible.  Luckily, he’s not crazy in addition to it and I was able to fade away without him repeatedly texting me like a stalker.

Anyway, Meat Head’s “about me” section was so good that I decided to throw caution to the wind! 

His “about me” had such a patient, non-judgmental vibe to it.  It was very genuine, just what you see is what you get.  I can’t remember how I came across it but I messaged him first and simply said “I really liked your profile.  I’d like to meet you.”  He replied that he had viewed my profile many times but had been shy and never messaged me.

We have been chatting and texting, yet with the circus of horrors that has been my life over the last few weeks, I just wasn’t excited to meet him.  I drove begrudgingly to the city.  I was sure that it would be another dead end.  I can’t tell you how many times I have messaged and texted and talked with someone and then met them in person and immediately knew it would never work.  It could have been something about the way they talked, or walked, or looked.  It could have been that they obviously built their profile around who they want to be instead of who they actually are and that’s an immediate turn off.

Still, I soldiered on yet telling myself, if this is yet another waste of time I’m done for a while.  I’m just going to go back to doing my thing, excercising, chasing kids around and working my butt off.

I picked a funky pizza place that I keep hearing about but had never been to yet.  So if nothing else, I’ll have tried a new place, and made sure it was LUNCH.  Lunch or coffee for first dates from now on, at least then it’s only like a 30 minute to 1 hour commitment in case it doesn’t go well.

Usually I appreciate meeting new people and have had fantastic two hour lunches even with people that were DEFINITELY NOT a match for me.  However, I seem to have a black cloud hanging over everything I do lately.

So, I do my best to shake off the attitude and head for the pizza place.

I get there first, AGAIN. (Why does that always happen?  ugh!)  It’s a fantastic funky place and I liked it a lot.  I’ve never seen so much tie dye in the same place at once, but I dig it.  The owners are definately Dead Heads, but I’m good with that.  I’m a fan…

I’m hanging around the hostess area when I see him heading for the door.  Not bad, I think.  He’s not super tall, which is good in my book because I’m not either.  I have to say that although my heart doesn’t care how tall a man is, I have to admit it’s nice to be able to look someone in the eyes with out craning my neck. 

He’s fairly stocky, but looks older to me than 39.  Definitely older than a man who had a 3 and a 6 yr old.  He has dark hair and he smiled and hugged me when he saw me.  All of that earn points for Meat Head.

We sit down and talk and I have such a peaceful easy feeling around him.  Yes, just like the Eagles song.  We chat for a while and have our pizza, and I notice myself staring at his neck.  Even though there seems to be potential here, I can’t get over the neck.  He’s got a sort of double chin, or loose neck or something.  Almost like a rooster.  It moved when he talked!  I kept telling myself and telling myself that it didn’t matter but I can’t stop thinking about it even days later.  He also had quite a belly on him, which I can handle…  but the neck, chin thing… ugh!

At one point during lunch he mentioned eating ice cream to offset the salty lunch, which made me kind of shake my head (on the inside).   You see he drives and ice cream distribution truck (not like an ice cream truck that drives through neighborhoods with it’s jingle playing, inciting riots over bomb pops etc) and I find myself wondering how often he raids the inventory.  I also remember the photo he sent me on my phone.  I thought it was just a fashion faux pas that his collar was up, but now I’m thinking he was purposely turned to the side and had his collar up to hide the rooster’s wattle.  

He’s also not a very active person.  😦  He never mentions anything active, like going to the gym or even going for a walk.  He does however play the guitar and has 11 tattoos… Couple more point, ding ding!

The first date went very well, but there were no fireworks.  Still we chatted easily and before I knew it, it had been an hour and 15 minutes.  We jumped up and headed for the door.   A nice hug and he was on his way back to work, while I headed back to hicksville, USA.    

Although I promised him a second date, I can NOT get over the rooster’s wattle.  I thought I could at first,but I can’t!  I’m not just looking for a short term thing.  I am searching for a soul mate and I can’t look at that stark white rooster’s wattle for the rest of my life!

*sigh*  It’s too bad too.  He’s such a nice guy.  I’m disappointed and I hate to be this concerned with physical appearance.. but in this case I just can’t help it.  Now, what am I going to say?  How do you break that to someone?    I am figuring I’ll go on a second date and then let him know I’m looking for fireworks and just not feeling it.  I hate to be so shallow, but it is what it is.  Honestly, I believe those people that say “looks don’t matter” are only foolin’ themselves. 

Still, I am filled with hope again.  I’m not sure why this date seemed to help me turn a corner but it did.  He’s out there, my soul mate, and maybe I just feel like I’m a little closer to finding him.

Published in: on March 18, 2011 at 10:59 pm  Leave a Comment  
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